Am I Pathetic?

It's 10:50 p.m. and I'm listening to BBC London Radio. It's 5:40 a.m. tomorrow morning there, so the traffic reports are starting to ramp up - backups, slip roads, roundabouts, and the like are being mentioned. I only listened to the radio while I was driving, so I have visions of Tilehurst roads in my head while I'm hearing these 2 guys chatting.

Anyway - yesterday on the way home from Amarillo, I put in the DVD of "Peppa Pig." It was a favorite of Audrey's while we were in England. While I was driving and listening to the infectious giggle of Peppa Pig and her little brother, George, I was taken back to that first week we were over there last summer. I could picture the green fields and teeny tiny country roads around our cottage. I actually longed to go back. Longed. I wanted to be in England more than I wanted to be back at home here in L.A. And I had just spent 2 full days and parts of 2 other days away from home with 3 kids. Homesick for a place not home.

But I really do want to go back. It was magical. How often do we get to participate in something that we consider magical? I'm so jealous that Steve is there now and I'm not. Actually, I think Steve is probably getting ready to leave now. Since, after all, it is 5:55 a.m. over there, I imagine he's near to waking up (if he's not up yet) and getting over to the airport.

I miss hearing the people talk. I miss the streets. I miss the silly little cars and the little shops. I miss the grocery stores and the "news agents" (convenience stores). I *really* miss my hairdresser. I miss the gym with the childcare. I miss the adventure of it all. It really was a marvelous adventure.

So what was my adventure today? I helped Audrey make a tiara. That may not have been magical for me, but I'm pretty sure it was for her. And I helped Caleb make a dinosaur costume-type-thing out of a brown paper grocery bag. Again, magical for those under the age of 7. I'm not begrudging them these things, don't get me wrong. I'm actually attempting to find the magic in them for myself.

It's not magical, but I've started a new knitting project. I'm making a "Plastic Bag Bag." I'm cutting plastic grocery bags into 3/4" inch strips and knitting them into a bag. Caleb told me I was crazy because I was making a bag out of bags. Oh well. Creative license.

I'm almost done with the purple hair. It's starting to fade out to the nasty orange that's underneath. When the orange is more visible than the purple, I'm going to have a professional bleach those orange bits and hopefully get them platinum so that my next color ("Virgin Rose" - what an awful name) will show up nice and pink. It actually looks like a dark magenta, but they told me at the Blue Monkey salon that if I mix the color with conditioner in equal parts, it will come out pink. Sounds fine to me. If I can get Audrey to be still for 20 minutes, I've promised her some pink hair. I think I'm going to do the tips of the hair around her face so that it can be trimmed off if need be.

Uuummm...

Caleb is sleeping in Audrey's room again tonight. He's on the floor. She's decided she's afraid of the dark. I don't know if it's a genuine fear or something she's hit upon as a successful way to get out of bed at night. It's hard to tell with her. But if Caleb is in her room and the hall light is on, she doesn't have much to complain about.

The lady on the radio is talking about going to lunch in Notting Hill. The other guy is talking about riding the ferry over to Dover. So British. And Waterloo. They don't say "WATER-loo" but "watah-LOO" - the accent is on the last syllable. They also don't say "either" but "EE-vah." They all don't say it that way, but I did hear it a lot.

I'm just pining now. It's not helpful for me to sit here and listen to the radio. Especially early morning radio. They're so energetic and talkative and it makes me miss it all. The TV shows were so entertaining, the grocery stores were entertaining, people watching was entertaining, transportation was entertaining. Maybe it was because it was all new and exciting - or entertaining. I decided while we were over there that if we have another boy, we'll name him the very British name of Declan. Pretty popular over there. I don't know if Steve will agree. I guess if we have another I should think of a very British name for a girl, too, just in case. There were 3 girls named Sophie in Caleb's class. Then there was Abooh in Audrey's class (a girl). Or Olivia. Emma, Emily, Chole...Louise!

They're talking now about a staff member who is going to another job. They're talking about his "leaving" card instead of his "going away" card. Interesting.

I'm going to be really miserable if I sit here much longer and pine, so I'm signing off now and I'm going to take my vitamins and go to bed.